Sunday, 6 July 2008

Ooo dear

Wells, I have not been a happy person recently. I seriously miss routine, structure and rules- something I should be rebelling against. The days are a blur, its driving me crazy. Wake up, do nothing, goto bed. If someone told me 5 months ago I was having a 3 month break, I would of been very happy. But, I know that again, I'd just of started blogspot 5 months ago and still be moaning.

Job Hunting

Many failed attempts of job hunting, putting my extortionately thin CV out there looking for work. Phones 4 U turnt me down (via letter the bastards) , so again I am still looking for work.
I don't get it though. With College starting in September, I cannot possibly have a full time job, but I can for now. I tell everyone (and wrote) I can work flexible hours and a lot of them throughout the summer. Silly idiots!

The Structured, unstructured day.

Anywho, I have not been completely without aim, structure and rules. I have made sure to take care of myself (something thats important) so beleive it or not I don't snack on junk all day. I seem to be having "down time" at around 2pm most days. I stick on a film and find something from the freezer I can have.

I have also been reading. Yes, reading. I have not in a long,long while (not since at least about August last year). Its uncool, so totally nerdish but I have 2 words for you:

try it!

Try reading for half an hour. It works wonders. You can escape into your own world, your OWN perceptions. Who can honestly taint your imagination hmmm?


Okay, you must know. I am a creative person. As much as I say it I mean it. If that borderlines arrogance or self confession then go read someone else's blog. However, I am finding these days I am not being creative. This has reflected again in my main love- TRLE (See below). I was on a huge high last month because of the release of my work, but now, its so tottaly gone I think it won't return. I have not built in trle for the past week and I just seem to have lost the passion for it. I am not happy. My former level "Suspension"- bore from the high- has now jsut not got anywhere. I think, perhaps, its time for a little break, or, a new focus. Perhaps the Guiding Hand will fix that. We'll see.

Final Word

Well, there must be more to do then this, but, at the moment, i'll keep at it. Tommorow I plan to just plan, and organise. Organise what I want to do, how I will do it, and research,reserch, research (i'm talking about trle here btw).

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